Dear Nick Cave //Letter 2

The Dear Nick Cave series, triggered by a letter I wrote Dec 2022 to Nick Cave

I found a letter I wrote to Nick Cave in Dec 2022, and I had not much idea what my train of thought was exactly, but it was drowned in sadness and loneliness and the agony of missing Jethro, his son, who had died earlier in the year.

This has sparked a bunch more letters I’d like to write to Nick Cave now. Maybe they are sort of like poetry. Letters can be.

Famous Blue Raincoat is a good example. Beautiful multi-layered poem. And it’s funny and smart and sad. It is constantly inspiring me.

But what inspires these letters is the pain of loving the deceased soul mates I’ve lost. I lost Jethro the same second Nick Cave did.

R.I.P Jethro Cave

Dear Nick Cave,

Why is there a new book out about you every six months? How much more can we know about you, yet still know absolutely nothing about you.

……or so you think

It’s written all over your face though these days, Nick Cave. I see it. I see the thing.

The blue.

It’s my favourite colour, I painted my nails blue tonight. It’s also my favourite tone of song

It’s not easy for me to write this in public though, about the music and those things. I maybe won’t discuss the music.

Because, it’s not simple, It’s like trigonometry!

It’s hard to express and maybe I can’t…… I can’t and now, that ever since Jethro Cave went away, it’s been the blackest day.

All I listened too was, Johnny Cash, Leonard Cohen, Joy Division, Echo and the Bunnyman, Kate Bush and Lana Del Rey.

That was that I played, but mostly just silence most days.

Silence is when I would go deeper and deeper, harder and harder and darker and darker.

It’s when I started looking for love, in all the wrong places. Namely the fifth dimension.

O

M

G

So I’d just turn the radio off, it’s would have been playing dead air in my mind………..(Is it strange that you're not here with me Jethro?)

I would then soon turn on the television, then turn off all of the lights, and I’d try to transmit my energy to him for eternity, wondering if he understands what I’m doing:

“CAN

YOU

HEAR

ME

???”

The music turns on and it gets so loud until these words transmit through me:

“Ground control to major tom, can you hear me all night long! GROUND CONTROL TO MAJOR TOM!”

I don’t think you understand Nick Cave, but I lost myself when I lost Jethro.

So I still get trashed when I feel that blue. I feel the blue. Like you. I instantly saw the blue, it was confronting and it was not nice.

You have it, we both have it.

And I understand that you may not have found it so fashionable for him to love me.

But what you didn’t understand, that there was truly no one else for me.

Sure, there might have been violence that surrounded us, but I didn’t care. I was never scared.

Because all I’d ever think, was that there was nothing to lose now I had found him.

But now..

I’m just dreaming my life away.

Sincerely

D.Conwell